Dee’s Space

Being new parents, we have suddenly discovered a whole wide space of ignorance that used to be our taken for granted “wisdom” in our hitherto carefree child-less existence.

Clearly, the fear and anxieties of pregnancy and a baby on its way were our motivations to seek answers and the paths that corresponded most closely with the birth we desired.  Never before did we have to even think about Birthing Options (are there options), seek to understand what babies, within the womb, and without, need, what terms like episiotomies and perineums actually mean.

Since our baby was conceived some 5 months ago, it’s been a journey of discovery and learning for Ken and I. We are blessed to be having our baby in Singapore, where information is widely available through copious amounts of literature and medical journals in book stores, libraries and online.   As long as you sought it, took the time to research and to speak to the community of care-providers, the way to the right birth you desire, can be yours.

While I was in the States on a vacation, I picked up a book called Your Best Birth which opened my mind to the various birth options available. It wasn’t just about what kind of birth you wanted, natural , surgical, aided, out in the forest… but rather, how involved  you want, and can be, throughout the journey that truly is yours and your baby’s own.  How much knowledge would you equip yourself with in order that what’s routine but medically unnecessary is not inflicted upon you simply because you were either too afraid or too ignorant to make your own mind up.   I felt simultaneously empowered and eaten alive with panic when I put the book down.  Empowered because I knew there was much I could do for myself to have the birth experience I desired.  I panicked because precisely so, there was so much to do.

I started to research and began conversations with my ob-gyn to understand her practises and what she advocates, and why.  I wanted to respect the medical approach by first understanding the approach of my doctor and her choices in circumstances where this approach takes centrestage. 

I enrolled in a HypnoBirthing Class that seeks a gentle shift in mindset for birthing mothers to see Birth and Labor as a natural process the Feminine form is not just engineered to perform but adequately equipped to do so beautifully without unnecessary stress and pain.   We dutifully attended weekly classes and learnt our relaxation and breathing techniques, practising with our hearts, minds and bodies.

So naturally, when it comes to the actual birth, we wanted to engage the doctor who would support and help us achieve the birth we wanted.

Much research online and via communities advocating natural, drug-free births recommended a particular doctor.  Seeing how we were doing fine with ours, the rave reviews about this doctor and his kind, pro-natural ways had us thinking maybe a 2nd opinion wouldn’t hurt and we could have a consultation, maybe he would fit into our birth team better than our current one.

Off we went gynae shopping.

To my disappointment and almost horror, I found out that the doctor who comes highly recommended by the community of Natural-Birth advocates, charges $3700+ for a 100% unmedicated, unassisted natural childbirth.  Whether this is at home, a birth center, or a hospital.  This is about twice what my current ob-gyn charges, medicated, assisted or otherwise. 

With this doctor, you had a choice of a less expensive package, if you chose a vaginal birth with active management of the 3rd stage of labour, that’s at $1800 (similar to that charged by other ob-gyns, intervened or otherwise). 

I found this pricing illogical because one would imagine that to go 100% natural would require the least intervention from the trained medical staff.  In this respect, what would the higher costs go towards covering?  Is it for the longer time needed for a non-intervened birth? Yet, isn’t that what advocating natural (read “spontaneous”) birth is about?  Labors could  last 30 mins or 30 hours.

More importantly, the desire of a natural birth is one that describes what a mother wants from her birth experience in its entirety.  Why would the doctor design his packages in a manner that introduces conflicts at any particular stage of labour (in this case, the 3rd or the delivery of the placenta)?  The idea that upfront, unintervened 3rd stage labour poses risk, also goes against the fundamental pillars of natural birth that trusts the female body is well equipped and capable of starting and completing the labour process, by itself.  

While I had started ob-gyn shopping as I had hoped to find a more compatible birth team-player, I find myself suddenly awakening to a stark realization that there should not be a *higher* price to a woman’s right to birth right.  Not if you had a voice, a firm approach and access to reasonable, cooperative and respectful doctors who bring with them not just respect for your birth preference, but their expertise and experience should the need to use them arises.  At the end of the day, I want my birth team to give me not just the birth I want, but the birth I need.

And this should not come at a premium.  This should not come with a hefty price tag. Because this is a right, not a privilege.  And while it’s every private practising doctor’s perogative to charge the fees his clientele is happy to pay, I hope we can be discerning enough to recognize that this is a business case, not a case of being Pro-Natural, lest of all, not a case of being an active, facilitating advocate, educator and proponent that lets women know the medical profession respects their bodies.  

So out of Camden I came; armed with my new-found knowledge and confidence to not place the birth I want on the very things that prey on my fears.  

 

 

 

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 12th, 2009 at 11:55 pm and is filed under Baby, Family. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.